GRRRR . . . I'm MAD.

Caution: I'm mad. Really, really mad. I may use some words that I normally don't use. If you are offended, stop reading now and just skip on to my next post about how fabulously adorable Matthew was when we took him to see the Monster Trucks.

But seriously, I'm pissed. Playing in the background right now, I'm listening to hold music. The same music I've been listening to on my speaker phone for about an hour and a half. It is not assuaging my anger, as I'm sure they are hoping.

Want to know what happened???? I know you do. Especially if you are still reading this. OK. Good. I'm telling you. We have Verizon (internet, home phone, television) and we've had them for a long, long time. So today, I'm going through our bills, making payments, when I start thinking about Verizon. Why is our bill $190? We have the $99 plan. I look at last month's bill and it's $170--the month before: $150. Hmmmm. No details in the bill except for mysterious charge to ILD Teleservices. Never heard of them? Check your bill and make sure. So, I look online/call Verizon. Basically, it's a scum bag scam company legitimate company set up to place charges of things you purchase on the internet (red flag) directly on your phone bill. What???? OK--I must be missing something. I buy things online and NEVER ONCE has there been a box to check "Place this charge on your PHONE BILL." I see "Pay with Visa, Master Card, American Express" but never, ever have I seen "Pay with your phone bill." Whatever. So, I call Verizon. They are basically no help because they say ILD is a legitimate company and I have to contact ILD directly. So I did. They credited one charge and told me I had to call the other company that was authorizing the other charges. I'm getting even more mad at this point. Fine. I also call Verizon and told them they are not to authorize any further billing from 3rd parties. That will take up to 24 hours to place on my account. Again--what??? This is the age of the internet. Isn't everything instant??? Apparently not, because according to ILD, it could take up to 2 fucking months to get this first charge reversed. Excuse me???

So, I contact the 2nd company, which is another complete fucking scam legitimate company, who ironically, happens to specialize in preventing ID theft--funny, since they are the ones running the scam legitimate charges. I search online and can't even find this company's web site. Wow, I'm a one-person photography business and I have a web site. Amazing how this big company is no where to be found. When I talk to the first person, she tells me I set up an account and authorized the charges. I DID NOT. She emails me the account info that I supposedly used to set up this account. It is my name and phone number, but everything else is false. My email, birthday, etc--not ME. Scam! So, I while I've been blogging, after being on hold for an hour and a half, Charlene, the "superviser" takes my call and credits me last month's charge. But wait, there's more. Now, I have to fax their Billing Dispute Department (who is probably some poor schmuk sitting at the desk next to Charlene's) to get them to reverse the previous months' charges. I'm just so pissed. Think of all the people, just like me, who don't notice their bills going up and up and just keep paying. That adds up to lots of money that these people are stealing.

What really pisses me off about this is that it is so obviously a scam. And I'm mad at Verizon for not notifying me that a 3rd party was trying to authorize charges on my account. Seriously. I'm calling the Attorney General. Grrrrrr. And to top it all off, this is happening on Tuesday! The day that I have no kids at home. The day I am supposed to clean, edit photos, and watch Days of Our Lives. This is so wrong. It's a good thing I'm not a crazy person with a shot gun! And I haven't even gotten my Diet Coke yet.